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August 21, 2006

New Skewl Yeer Resolushuns.

I am getting edumacated!

Okay, anyway, I know I have had a post like this almost every semseter for the last four semesters, and I haven't gone through with it, really. But this time, I think things have changed. Before, everything I was trying to do, schoolwise, was simply for my parents. There was little of me involved besides "Things might get annoying for me if my parents are pissed off." I feel like I have a reason to attend class and turn in shite and get quasidecent grades. I want to graduate. I'm tired of it all, I'm done, and if I don't finish all this shit up now, I know I never will. Surely a liberal arts degree with decent but not astounding grades is better than no degree at all when trying to find employment. I want to knock this out and be done with it, and get away from my parents and start actually living my life, or at least finding out what the hell my life is. With all that said, the goals for this semester are:

1) Be a good student. Note that I'm sure what alot of people think of as a "good student" is not what I'm aiming for. I am aiming for going to every class and turning SOMETHING in for every assignment, even if it's not as good as I could do if I completely applied myself. A's are nice, but B's will get me graduated just as fast as getting A's, and if keeping my nervous panic down to nothing means I get a B instead of an A, I'm not going to worry about it. Which leads me to...
2) I am going to have fun. I worry way the fuck too much, and although I still have plenty of problems following the aftermath of the horridly failed talk with my parents over my gender stuff, for whatever reason I have learned one thing from it all, and it's odd, because it doesn't seem to be very related... I don't know. But for the first time in a long, long while, I feel like I deserve to have fun. I do. I deserve it. And I am going to have it. And worrying is not fun, so I am going to do as little of it as possible. I will enjoy my time I have left here, living like this, because once I graduate, EVERYTHING is going to change. I need that change desperately, but I know me, and I know I am going to miss this alot. Hell, I'm honestly getting a little worked up just typing this out right now. So while I'm here, I am going to have the best fucking time I can, and I'm not going to let anyone get in the way of that, because, as I said, I deserve it.
3) I'm going to walk. I took a walk last night, just from my house to the Osage Center. I'm guessing it took me about an hour. I base this guess on the fact that it took me about 28 minutes to get to the Osage Center, so it surely took about that much time to get back. But I could use the exercise. I don't get any, really, besides working trucks. I don't really enjoy running around and Frizbeeing with everyone else. I just want to do something non-stressful and intense. So I've decided, days I don't have work, I'm going to take a walk and listen to podcasts. Shouldn't be a problem, I can do it at some point when Brer needs to get his schoolwork done, so I don't distract him from that. And I get a little exercise. And I get to catch up on the shittons of backed up podcasts I have. I have so many I need to catch up on, and I mean, hell, I just added Pseudopod to my podcatcher today. The list of ones I want to listen to only gets bigger. So this'll help with that. But yeah, walking. Gonna do that.

And that's it, I guess. Does that sound like good goals? I hope so. Maybe, for once, I'll meet the goals that I set for myself... I think I will... this is the first time I've set goals like this for me, and not for other people... and that, I think, will help me complete them quite a bit... we'll see, of course...

Posted by poetfox at August 21, 2006 01:38 PM

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