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October 13, 2004
First day of the rest of your life...?
Okay, nevousness went to shock, then to overwhelming joy, and now back to nervousness again... I have to get this actually finally started... and that's weird. I have to get out and find a professional someone to talk to... I wish I had like... people around here I knew that could help me, but I really don't... it's unforunate... heh... and scary...
I mean, I do have people that will help me. My friends are all awesome, they'll do what they can, but they don't have firsthand experience I can pull from. Josh is the only person I talk to who does, and he's quite the busy soul and since he doesn't live around here can't suggest people or places to go to me anyway, much less take me there so I'm not a scared little freak the whole time... I can see me walking into some therapist's office and just sitting there, terrified, the whole time... I want to get something out of everything, I want to do the right thing...
I need to face the facts that I'm going to have to blaze this trail for myself... I've been wanting something to make me do something like that... something to give me confidence... and now here it is, right before me... I just need to step up and take it... take it and run with it... heh...
Let's hope it all works out okay...
In celebration of me being out of the closet, I revised some magic cards over on the Inside Joke page, feel free to take a look at them. There's been a couple new ones you might have not seen, too. My new card is much more white and much more me and much more... invoking the legends rule with other versions of me while also being able to utilize other me-specific cards. Go team. I also got to make maleme a wall cause I realized, since I was a Wall Avatar, basically, and creature type Wall no longer carried any baggage, I saw no reason not to, and I kicked down his toughness to even it out a bit.
But yeah, anyway...
Other things I'm worried about: Draco, and what to do with him... holy shit, that's it? Just two? Getting this whole thing started and Draco-kun? Hot damn. ^_^ My worry list is small tonight! Rock on!
Time to read the new Magic articles and then off to bed with this little foxie.
Posted by poetfox at October 13, 2004 12:55 AM
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